Turn your stories, articles, or blog posts into newsletters, summaries, viral threads, and quote packs—all automatically, anonymously, and powered by AI.
Privacy-first: All processing is performed by a locally-run AI model—never sent to the cloud or to any third-party AI. Your words stay yours.
How it Works
Send your content: Submit your article, story, or blog post (no registration required).
Choose your output: Newsletter, summary, quotes, Twitter threads, or all of the above.
Minimum: $10.00 USD equivalent in XMR. (Feel free to pay more if you wish.)
No personal info required—anonymous by design.
Receive your deliverables: Get the outputs delivered to your inbox or anonymous download link.
Ready? Just send your content and XMR—let’s turn your ideas into gold.
Why Content Alchemy?
No personal data required—privacy by design
Fast, soulful, human-quality output
Stay off the algorithmic grid
100% local processing: Your files are never sent to OpenAI, Google, or any corporate cloud.
Handcrafted automation: All code is custom-built and run directly by me—no outsourcing or reselling.
No accounts, logins, or tracking
Contact / Order
After payment, email your article, story, or blog post to:
peelingdistortion@proton.me All output types (newsletter, summary, quotes, and Twitter threads) are included in your package—just send your content and we’ll do the rest!
Optional: To speed up delivery, include your payment transaction ID (TXID) in your email.
Most orders are processed within 6–10 minutes per article (up to 24 hours max for busy times).
Prefer a more private channel? Suggest a secure messenger or anonymous upload—your privacy is respected.
Sample Output
Newsletter Example: Subject: The Amazon's "Tipping Point": Forests Incinerated at Record Pace Amid Drought, Fires
Dear reader,
The smoke rises, a thousand voices silenced, a million lives extinguished. The forests, ancient sentinels of wisdom and life, burn away like kindling in our greed's hands. What will we lose, when their wisdom is gone? What will we gain, when the climate's balance is broken?
For years, we've watched the Amazon, the lungs of the Earth, struggle for breath. Last year, the fires that devoured them were the worst on record. In the face of relentless drought, human carelessness, and the hunger for profit, their resilience cracked. The smoke of their burning reached the heavens, a final plea for understanding.
What will become of the creatures who call these forests home? What will become of us, who rely on their ancient wisdom to breathe? As the fires rage, and the forests fall, we must ask ourselves: are we willing to let this world burn, or can we find a way to protect the very air we need to live?
"Have we forgotten the forests' wisdom, and our own place in the web of life? As we watch the smoke rise, can we find a way to heal the wounds we've inflicted?"
Warmly,
Summary Example:
The ancient voices of the Earth are being silenced, extinguishing the eternal flame of life's resilience that resides within all things. As we destroy the sacred songs of the forests, we burn the future in our own hearts, eroding the wisdom of the ages and the intricate web of life that sustains us.
This loss of forest is not just a numbers game—26,000 square miles of ancient life disappearing every year—but a stark warning to humanity about the fragility of our own existence. It is a call to action, a reminder that the very air we breathe, the water we drink, and the food we eat all depend on the delicate balance of life in these precious ecosystems.
Quotes Example:
"Every tree that falls is a piece of our collective soul that breaks off and shatters on the ground, leaving a hole in the heart of the world."
"There's no reason why we can't have positive stories in the future."
"It's a clear signal that current policies are not sufficient to protect tropical forests."
Twitter Thread Example:
🌍 Tropical forests vanished faster than ever recorded in 2024—67,000 sq km lost, equivalent to 18 football fields a minute. Fires outpaced agriculture for the first time. 🚒🌳 #ClimateCrisis #Forests #HermesThread
🌳 The Amazon, once a carbon sink, now burning at its worst drought on record. A tipping point looms as forests switch to savanna, threatening biodiversity & global climate. 🐒🦓 #AmazonRainforest #ClimateEmergency #Tropical #HermesThread
🏞️ Tropical forests store hundreds of billions of tonnes of carbon. Their loss raises questions about resilience in a warming world. 📉 #CarbonStorage #ClimateAction #HermesThread